I want to preface this poem with a little explanation. It has been a long time since I have been able to write poetry. It has felt like an essential part of me has been asleep or cut off. I don’t claim my poetry is any good but writing it is something I need to do like breathing.
Words and phrases had been going through my mind for a few days last night I wrote for the first time in over a year.
This poem is on example
Everything I have ever wanted
Standing in front of me
Close enough to touch
I reach out with my mind
My heart
Everything I want to be
Spread out before me
Tantalizing in its closeness
Its completeness
The answer to my prayers
My tears / my pain
As I reach out
I touch nothing but air
A mirage / a dream
Fleeting
Induced by desperation
Loneliness/ fear
I am standing alone in a desert
A vast empty place
Fate and hope are cruel
Adept at deceiving
Breaking
Can something that was never whole be broken?
I have been here before
Only then I believed
In apparitions
My biggest mistake
My frailty
I look up into the familiar sky
The wind brushes my face
I feel too much
I don’t want to feel /to know
The truth
Spelled out
Whispered in my ear
echoing
As the tears run unbidden
Down my face
To the dust below
YOU ARE LOVED
Today you are born
A new life full of promise
And hope
I smile to think of all you will learn
I wonder who you will grow to be
No matter the person you become
Dear one
there is no question
You will become someone
Truly special
for you are
truly loved
You may wonder how I know
The truth dear one is it’s easy to tell
All you have to do is be quiet
watch and listen
For it is all around you
The love is there in your mother’s smile every time
She thinks or speaks of you
As real and vibrant now as the first time
when she told me you
were coming
a glow lighting her from within
It’s there in your father’s eyes
every time he looks at your mom
it’s there in the way they can’t help but touch
from time to time
There is so much love between them
It takes my breath away
And already their love is growing
Reaching out
To you
Holding you safe and warm.
It’s in the happiness of your family and friends
In the excitement in all of us as we wait for you
A new grandchild, or cousin or niece or nephew or friend of our very own
To play and laugh with
You will learn to see and feel it too
The love your parents and family have for you
Will always be around you
A part of you
In every look, in very laugh
In every kiss or hug
Even in anger or tears
Yes dear one even then
love will be there too.
And you will grow in every way
Secure in yourself
And in the knowledge
They you love and are loved in return
This is the greatest of gifts
Now you know the secret
You know love is everywhere
All around you
Inside and out
All you have to do is look
Inside your heart
And you will have reason
To doubt
you will know
forever and always
You are LOVED
This is a poem I wrote in 2002 for my Facing History and Ourselves class
I looked on in horror
images of rape and death
a baby crying alone amid total destruction
"it would be alright if we only raped them"
bayonet practice
people being mauled
no longer human beings
but sheep and dogs instead
sickness
revolution
anger
how can people have no conscience
where do their souls go?
killing machines
all part of war
denial
immunity of the heart
scars yet to heal
untold sorrow and tears
"bullets bleed holes"
cries unheard
times untold in history
“the forgotten holocaust”
"They'll never accept you"
She doesn't know you hear her
what she is really saying is
"I'll never accept you
words
hateful
intense
life changing yet
not forceful
Her voice
quiet
measured
calm
her meaning
sudden
unexpected
revealed
the blindfold
You self imposed
held in place by years of denial
of love
ripped away
by a supposed act of kindness
the message is clear
you hear the ugly truth
behind the words
You are quiet
still
unmoving
just breathe
she won't notice
won't realize
what she has done
won't know
how her words shattered your
already fragile, turbulent world
you stare out the window
unseeing
yet really understanding
for the first time
reality setting in
your dreams
hopes
for acceptance and understanding
gone
the last bit of innocence in you
withering away
you felt yourself
dying in the instant
the words fell from her lips
Floating away
Long to be free
Free of you/free of me
Floating away
Outside myself
Touching the sky
Expansion of my mind’s eye
Lost in space
In time
Drifting away
Free
Free to be
Somebody new
Free to forget
The confines of my body
My mind
My pain assuaged
Momentarily
By the night
Free to soar above
Suddenly looking forward
Every possibility open
To me
Free.
To be
One with the universe
Soul Connected
Still
I wait frozen in time
Suspended
I can see everything
A part of me
Free
I am me/The real me
No excuses/no shame
Drifting on the wind
High above
My body
I find acceptance
My hopes and dreams
Momentarily restored
Made whole
By my out of body experience
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